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| My grandma Caroline, Poppy and one-year-old me (1999) |
It’s been a month since my grandpa passed. He was the last of my grandparents to leave this world and I’ve been reflecting on all the wonderful memories that I shared with him. My family affectionately called him Poppy, but his real name was Robert Thomas Brown.
I’d like to dedicate this blogpost to him, not only because I miss him but because Poppy enjoyed reading this blog and often complimented my descriptive writing style. He was very encouraging toward all of my gifts, most particularly my music. I will dearly miss his presence in my life.
Robert Thomas Brown was born on June 4 in 1932 to William Edward Brown and Florence Ounan at Hahnemann Hospital, Philadelphia. He grew up with two brothers and two sisters: Frank, Marie, Bill and Kathy. During the Great Depression, he worked as a paper boy to support his family. Even in his next job, which was working in a plumbing supply house, half of his wages went to his mom so that they had enough to eat. His mother was a devout Catholic so they went to mass regularly where Poppy would serve as an altar boy. Later in life, he served as an usher at St Joseph R.C. Church in Lincoln Park, NJ. |
| My great-grandma Florence, Poppy and his little sister Kathy |
In his childhood, Poppy said there was barely any time for play; it was either chores or work. Some of his chores included digging holes to put the sewer in and pouring concrete. He would assist his mom in maintaining a victory garden in their backyard and help fix his dad’s car whenever it broke down. “It always broke down on the coldest and hottest days of the year,” he told me with a lighthearted chuckle. That’s one of the things I’ll miss the most about him, his soft and wispy laughter whenever he told me stories.
My grandpa described his father as a stern man who instilled a hard work ethic in him. His dad had to leave high school during his sophomore year to start working, so that must have taught Poppy to value working from an early age. He worked as a paper boy up until his high school graduation which left him unable to participate in extracurricular functions like his school musicals and plays.
But Poppy found ways to redeem the time when he was able to hang out with his friends, participate in sports and be a Boy Scout. In grade school, he won his intramural basketball competition hosted by American Legion. He also participated on the track team. He enjoyed roller skating, fishing, swimming, and making forts with friends. When I asked him about his favorite memories from his youth, he responded with having mud fights with friends and diving in local swimming pools.
"What's one of your favorite memories of your mom?" I had asked him last March.
"Oh, well my mother would often fall asleep on her chair," Poppy started. "And there was this one time when I asked her if I could swim at a local pool with my friends. She was knocked out on the chair, her head tilted back and eyes closed, but she managed to mutter a low 'uh huh.' That gave me a good laugh. I can still remember it!" He had a gleam in his eyes when he recounted that memory. Whenever he spoke of his mother with me, it was evident that he greatly valued her presence in his life.
Poppy also had fond memories of marching in American Legion’s July 4th parades in Philadelphia. “You’d hold a flag and march over to a football field,” he described, “where they’d give you 5 tickets for soda and hot dogs.” Christmas was his favorite time of year because he loved to set up train tracks. He would listen to big bands like the Glenn Miller Orchestra and watch silent film actors like Tom Mix. One of his favorite memories was lying on the living room floor with his family, eating ice cream and donuts while watching wrestling matches on their small TV. I remember interviewing him about the kind of technology he grew up with for a college project of mine. I posted the video on YouTube so click here if you'd like to watch.
After high school, Robert’s next job was working at Standard Press Steel Technology. In 1952, he was drafted into the Korean War. He received training in Breckinridge, KY where he marched in a few United States Army parades. He played the clarinet and alto sax, the same instruments his father played, in the Eighth United States Army Band before being moved to the Coast Guard, serving two years in New York.
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| Robert Brown serving in the Coast Guard in NY (1952-1954) |
When he was honorably discharged, Robert met Caroline LoGrande for a date at a New Jersey diner. I remember him telling me, "I chased her until she caught me!" They married in 1954 at Our Lady of Mount Virgin Church in Middlesex, NJ and went on to have three children: Barbara, Robert and Gregory. At Caroline’s request, they moved from Philadelphia to Lincoln Park in 1965 to be closer to her family.
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| My grandpa's long side burns and my grandma's beehive hairdo are something else... 😄 |
Robert majored in electrical engineering at the Drexel Institute of Technology and started his own company called Electronic Power Designs, Inc. in Boonton. He was known for his trustworthy business and good reputation by his employees, and he had a loyal list of clients. In his 50s, he survived small cell lung cancer and continued working until the age of 79.
In retirement, Robert often attended music concerts, went on cruises and watched football games. He was an Eagles fan his whole life because of his roots in Philadelphia. He was always learning new skills, including how to play the piano in his 70s so he could perform songs from classic singers and musicals. “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond, “My Way” by Frank Sinatra, “Love Changes Everything” and “Music of the Night” by Andrew Lloyd Webber were some of his favorites.
Poppy loved to sing karaoke whenever he got the chance. As his granddaughter, I appreciated his support in all of my singing performances and musical projects. I still have a voicemail from him where he says he listened to my CD and to call him back because he had a couple questions about it. In one of our last conversations, he wished me luck for my upcoming music gig in Boonton. I decided to include “Annie’s Song” by John Denver in my set list because that was a song we had once sung over the phone to each other when I was learning it on guitar.
Growing up, I always looked forward to Poppy and Grandma Brown visiting my family on Sunday evenings. My grandma Caroline wanted to use every opportunity to spoil us, so she had Poppy order chocolate milk shakes from Burger King to give to my sisters and me every time they visited. For Easter holidays, she would gift us huge Barbie-themed eggs filled with candy inside. Whenever it was nice outside, Poppy would open the sun roof of his car and let us stand on his center console so we could peek out the window. Then, he would whizz around our driveway so it felt like we were riding a rollercoaster which felt like such a rush when you're little. Looking back, it was definitely a creative way for him to bond with us.
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| Singing "Sweet Caroline" with him :) |
In the summertime, Poppy and Caroline would join my family for weeklong vacations in Wildwood Crest. Poppy liked to body surf in the waves while the rest of us used boogie boards. In the evenings, we'd attend outdoor concerts where tribute bands would perform Billy Joel classics and other popular music from the 70s and 80s. At the end of the week, we’d eat at Duffer’s where an old-fashioned toy train would always be chugging along the walls of the room and a small teddy bear would ride a wired unicycle above us as we ate our breakfast. Then, we'd play games in the arcade and use our coins to win prizes and candy. Those were fond memories that I will always cherish.
Poppy was known by friends and family for his generosity, his quick wit and his lighthearted sense of humor. He was a proud patriot and a steadfast Catholic, and I remember him often talking about the Lord’s grace over the years of his life. He is predeceased by his wife, Caroline, and his brothers, Francis and William. He is survived by his sisters Kathleen Bode and Marie Linton; his children, Barbara Thiem and her husband Michael; Robert Brown and his wife Kathleen; Gregory Brown and his wife Sheila; his granddaughters, Sarah, Amanda, Kimberly, Madison, McKenna and Morgan; and his great granddaughter, Quinn.
I’m grateful to everyone who attended his memorial service last month. It was a privilege to write his obituary, share his story and see how many lives he touched through his kindness, innovative mind and down-to-earth spirit. My grandpa lived a long and full life up until the age of 92, and I’m grateful that I got to make so many memories with him. Yellow was his favorite color so I made sure the funeral spray was decked in it. I think it reflected his optimism and sense of joy that permeated throughout his life and carried him through his trials and illnesses. I hope I can emulate that same spirit of faith as I navigate through my life.
I’d like to close with a verse from Romans 14:8, a verse that my father recently shared with my family as we have been grieving.
“If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.”
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